BETTER VISIBLE THAN INVISIBLE

I had known Dr. D’souza for the last seven years. A doctorate in chemistry Dr. D’souza was in the evening of his life. After a long stint at Nairobi he had chosen this small hill town Dehradun to spend the rest of his life. Dr. D’souza a true scientist still carried his passion for the subject. It was well known his sprawling house housed a well-equipped lab where D’souza was known to spend many hours dabbling in chemicals, as any layman would call it.

You may wonder, I a perfectly innocuous man, nor a man of letters or power and position, a humble government servant struck friendship with an erudite person like D’souza.

It all started with our pet dogs. My Rocky was no pedigree. Like its master it was a humble breed. However it never lacked any confidence. Perhaps secure in the affection we used to shower on it in ample measure, a friendly out going dog Rocky tried to strike friendship with D’souza pedigree lady pansy.

Dr. D’souza a stickler to morning walks with lady pansy in toe was rather relieved to get a companion for the frustrated bitch and our friendship blossomed. He found me a good listener for all the long lived in tales at Nairobi while our respective dogs were engrossed in one another.

It was then one day he casually told me about the potion LEM-X as he called it, which he has concocted, which would make a person vanish from the scene for six complete hours. I was hearing him indulgently as a grownup son would hear the babbles of his grand father, for by then I had developed a strong affection for the old affable man though I suspected him a bit eccentric even lunatic. Well as they tell there is a very thin line dividing between sanity and lunacy, I never questioned many a tall tales Dr. D’souza had narrated me. What I know of the ways of the ways of the world, a humble government servant.

Hence when D’souza waxed eloquent about this potion LEM-X and how he had made it and its potency in vanishing human beings. I was half nodding half listening keeping an eye on the antics of rocky and lady pansy. How ever I did notice Dr. D’souza more excited than usual. So when he invited me to his mansion to taste the potion LEM-X I just quietly went like a lamb led with out contemplating for a moment either the absurdity of potion LEM-X or the magnitude of its effects.

Led by sprinting Rocky and lady pansy we entered Dr. D’souza’s sprawling house. While the dogs were left out to amuse themselves Dr. D’souza led me to his revered lab. It was the first time he was showing me the prestigious lab and I was honored that I didn’t think twice when D’souza gave me the potion LEM-X, a green hideous liquid in a glass very much like the ‘sherbet’ we offer to a frequent visitor. I just drank it like given champagne to an honored guest.

It was hard to believe and harder to describe, what happened in a fraction of a minute. Me a 5’ 10” man, always proud of my ample girth and masculine form vanished in to thin air. All there stood was my clothes, the gray tweed coat and matching pair of trousers, like a pair of dresses hung out to dry. My hands had vanished, not a sign of my protruding paunch. Dr. D’souza dug out a mirror from the littered drawer and held it towards where my face was. All I could see was a slanted hat in place where my baldhead was. I slowly removed my hat, then my coat, a pair of trousers and my under garments though I found a little embarrassing to do it in front of the erudite Dr. D’souza.

And you guessed there was no more sign of me, I vanished with out a trace only the pile of clothes stood testimony to what I was. No doubt I got unnerved while Dr. D’souza rambled eloquent about the LEM-X and numerous months or was it yrs he had spent to make it a real potent one. Between all the ramblings I could decipher one thing, this miracle will last me for six complete hours.

My brain though vanished in physical sense was still working all right. It soon hatched plots to make most of the situation.

Like any youngster I had spend yrs daydreaming about many such improbable happenings but seeing it happen now at the ripe age of 55 it was a bit hard to take. I nevertheless was getting smart to the situation though the old brain was taking some incubation time to come to grip of the situation.

I looked at the timepiece at the mantle, it was 8 ‘0’ clock still two hours for my office to start and a clear three hours before lunch time when the whole office will empty out faithfully to partake the days portion of humble meal. I slipped out of the back door telling D’souza I will be back by 2.30 to collect my dresses for I did not want to get caught literally with my pants down.

Off I went home. My Dharmpatni was as usual in the kitchen making the numerous potions for her brood of children and grand children. My eldest son was scanning through the day’s paper. His wife, the ‘bahu’ of the house was serving him tea and his favorite snacks. I could notice a meaningful glee in her face as she fondly lifted a ‘pakori’ and gave it to her husband. I immediately guessed it was a prelude to a confidential conversation. I had by then flopped in the corner chair having decided to observe the going on from the undisturbed place. The ‘bahu’ at least seemed concerned while the rest of the house was oblivious. “Where is pappaji? He hasn’t returned so far” “Oh he must be with the old hag Dr. D’souza” commented my eldest Sri Putran and got busy marshalling the news and the ‘pokaras’ fondly offered by dear wife.

“Well have you given a thought about Suresh. With 58% marks where do you think he will get admission. My bhabhi was telling with just 65,000 Rs. We can get him admitted in the newly opened regional college”

My son lifted an eye from the paper eyed his wife “where do you think such kind of money is”?

“Oh you can ask papaji. He is retiring in couple of yrs. A handsome amount would have been accumulated in provident fund. I am sure he can take some advance.”

In answer my Sri putran lifted a ‘pokora’ as he masticated it with all the seriousness of a cow chewing the cud, the idea seemed to enter him as his eyes sparkled with some light of comprehension over the spectacles. “Let Papaji come, I think if that is so Papaji wont deny” The job accomplished the bahu left leaving her husband to munch the rest of the ‘pokoras’

In came my college going daughter Dinkie wearing the tight fitting jeans and loose printed shirts and close cropped hair. It was hard to tell if it was Dinkie or was it shammi her brother. The doubt was cleared when the shrill voice came out in cascades.

“Bhaiya where is papaji not yet back from walk”. Well yet another concerned soul

“I told papa to leave me in college. I had to reach today by nine. Bhaiya why don’t you leave me”

“I cant do it. My scooter is out of order and further its low in petrol”

“Oh don’t worry. Take papa’s scooter. Come on now. Put on a shirt. I am getting late.”

My Sri Putran reluctantly got up took my scooter key from Dinkies hands and was off taking his dear sister.

It was Shammi my youngest of the brood coming rushing out. Wearing faded denim, an ill-fitting loose shirt, and hair disheveled and chewing a gum in the mouth.

“Mom where is Dad?” Well was it a concerned soul. My Dharampatni who was out with a plate of ‘parathas ignored the question and extended the plate to her ladla Beta.

“Mom I want a twenty Rs. Urgently. Today we are all planning to eat out”. He stuffed the ‘parathas’ in the mouth washed it with a glass of water while my Dharampatni took a crisp 20 Rs. note from a rusted tin in the corner of the shelf. I felt aghast. It was 28th of the month and here I was for last one week making do with ones and twos while a complete hidden treasure trove was perched right in the shelf.

It was now time for me to go to office so far neither my Dharampatni or any body had seriously pondered about my absence.

However being invisible does not make the pangs of hunger invisible. I slowly gravitated towards the kitchen when my dharampatni came out to haggle with the ‘sabziwalla’ and then went to the bathroom with the thud thadam of the clothes being banged in the bare floor.

I smuggled 3 hot parathas from the pile and like my son stuffed if in my mouth, washed it down with a glass of water and dashed out. It was still half an hour for the office to start. I remembered I have to trudge to the office today, which will involve 3 km walk.

It was stupendous task to walk with out some passer by dashing against me. It was a sight to see the expression of the people as they dashed against the invisible me. I then took the by lanes and scurrying like a alley cat reached my office puffing and panting at 10.30.

Mr. Sharma my roommate had arrived. Did I notice a look of smugness in his demeanor. I teetotaler of habits had always objected Sharma munching away the paan like a cow chewing the cud. Of late he had started behaving and I used to only see him sneaking a paan after lunch and one just after the stipulated tea at three. Today he had his box of paan openly outside. At 10.30 he must have decided he is safe from me and I am not going to come. A man of least sophistication he was literally squatting on the chair munching away the paan and as I could see making an STD call from the phone allocated to me. “Hello Yaar. Is it Meerut? I am sharma here. At last I could phone you today. The old rascal has not come and I am planning to make most of it. So how is Mausaji? Did chintu get admission in pre k.g.” The talk went on, around all the family gossip while the meter must have run amuck.

The peon Ram Singh entered with a smirk on his face “Namaskarji, Sir are you alone today?”

Sharmaji lifted his eyes from the receiver and offered him a couple of paans. No doubt to make him party to his deeds. Ram singh happily took the paans and started chewing it right inside my room.

I did not have a stomach to see the going on and moved to the main hall where the rest of the staff was gathered.

There I could spot Mrs. Nautiyal, my assistant snuggly near the heater and knitting furiously like there is not going to be a tomorrow. There was no trace of the files, the important works I had assigned her just yesterday evening. My hands itched to bang the table but I retraced slowly my itching hands.

There I can spot Mr. Joseph and Srinivas in a heated conversation. I always had a sneaking doubt Mr. Joseph had a lot of unpleasant things to talk about me especially after he was over looked for the promotion inspite of being in my batch. Slowly I gravitated towards them. My doubts were not bellied. Mr. Joseph was giving a spicy description about my well-kept paunch while Mrs. Mithal was dissolving in to peals of laughter. Then it was a commentary on my incompetence, how I cringe and grovel in front of M.D. while Mrs. Mithal with giggles and laughter was adding enough fuel to the fire. With such reception Mr. Josephs bravado was increasing more and more. My blood boiled. I wanted to make a straight drive at Joseph’s neck as well give a whack or two to the giggling Mrs. Mithal like a schoolgirl. However I moved telling after all you can’t expect any enlightenment from lesser souls like Joseph and Mrs. Mithal.

By 11.30 when it was clear I am not to be around the office seemed to have drifted to a mood of festivity. Some hot ‘samosas’ and ‘gulab jamuns’ arrived from the near by Joint. It was gulped down with cups of hot tea. Mrs. Nautiyal called her husband to tell she will be back home early.

I trudged back home by 1.30. My Dharampatni no doubt was at the verandah sitting there with a worrisome look. The bahu was in her room taking an afternoon siesta. The house was empty otherwise.

I hurriedly went back to Dr. D’souza. It was just 20 minutes to go by. Dr. D’souza was at the lab. Another potion of the hideous liquid was ready there was an option for me to have yet another dose. However with 6 hrs in the invisible world, my fantasies lived in, I was ready to trade in to the visible world for any prices.

Mr. D’souza could sense me. He greeted me “so sir how was the day”. I saw my clothes as I had left heaped on the chair. I wore it one after another. It was by them 2 ‘o’ clock. Yet no sign of me. I was truly threatened. Being invisible was no more a bliss. Ever so gradually I started to see me filling my contours, eyes, nose, moustache, the bald head, the well stocked paunch all my dear possessions were back and I would say I was happy back to be me.